10 Things You Would Like to Say to Your Boyfriend But Can’t Because He Broke Up With You

This post is dedicated to the ladies out there that are heartbroken, miserable, and confused because their boyfriend or significant other had broken up with them and don’t know what to do but have things they wish they could say but can’t.

  1. “Hey, how’s it going?”

    Oh my god. Ladies, am I right? Don’t we wish we could just ask this question? But we can’t because we don’t want to come off desperate and it’s what society is telling us not to do. So sometimes, you wish you could say “Fuck society!” but  now your friends telling you that it might be a bad idea? And then for some crazy reason, there’s the unspoken rule that you should probably wait at least 8 months to a year to ask how they’re doing and what they’re up to. It hurts. I know.
  2. “Have you seen the latest episode of (insert both your favorite show here)?”Um. No, I did not because it hurts too much to watch it because it only reminds me of my ex. Then you start to regret and wonder, WHY DID WE SHARE SIMILAR INTERESTS?! Why couldn’t we have been our own individuals so I can watch the shows and the movies that I want without thinking about my ex. It hurts!
  3. You want to post inside jokes and links on his Facebook wall…
    … BUT YOU CAN’T. Especially since all his friends know that you both are broken up and it’d be too awkward for everyone to want to see any interactions happening between you two. They’ll start asking questions and wonder what’s going on and then he’ll have to speak for the both of you and you probably don’t want him to do that.
  4. “Did you know Wes Craven died?”
    I know how much you love the Scream franchise so I wish I could say this to you but I can’t…
    *walks away crying*….
    *returns from crying to ask…*
  5. “Why?”
    I just need to know why. Why won’t you tell me why you broke up with me? Do you know how many times I posted on the Whisper app thinking that someday, somehow, somewhere, you will find my thoughts and reply?!
    I’m sorry folks. I’m getting off track here. Where was I?
  6. “How’s your family doing? (aka am I allowed to still be friends with them?… (probably not))”
    You break up with him, you’re not only breaking up with him but his entire family too depending how long this relationship has been. Because quite frankly, maybe you did genuinely enjoyed the company of his family and their sense of humor. They were good people but now you can’t send them texts or see how they’re doing… because… yeah 😦
    I’m sure there’s 4 more to add to this list but now I can’t go on. I’m too depressed.
  7. Why is this happening?
  8. What did I do wrong?
  9. Will you please be honest with me?
  10. I’m sorry…

Ladies, it sucks to have your heart broken and it sucks even more to not be able to talk to that one person whom you talked to almost every day.  You think about all the memories and it pains you… you try to distract yourself by overbooking your schedule with activities and it seems to help, but at the end of the day, you come home still wondering and feeling angry, sad, and betrayed. It’s one thing if the break-up was mutual or if you’re the breaker and not the breakee…but if you’re the one that’s been broken up with, you are left with many questions…. “Why does this keep happening to me? Why do I keep pushing them away? What am I doing that is making them so unhappy? What can I do to change?”…. and it’s hard to seek out the answers that you need because there’s no right or wrong answers…
My friends have been telling me that it’ll take time and it’s true. I’m still really sad but hey, at least I stopped crying. This blog was supposed to be about humor so I apologize for not writing a funny witty or clever post. I’m sure there’s humor in pain somewhere here but it’s hard for me to find now considering my heart has been slashed and broken into many pieces… and then my dogs try to cheer me up but ended up eating my heart because they’re always so freaking hungry.

My point is– now is the time to take care of yourself first. You’re allowed to be selfish. Do whatever the fuck you want.
We’re going to be okay.
We’re going to be okay.
We’re going to be okay….